1. Standing Next To Midgets So I can Feel Powerful 2. Farting next to a midgets knowing they get the full brunt of it due to their small frame 3. Crisp and salad cream sandwiches!! 4. French Knickers or simple pants please 5. Seeing the odd fat person fall over or trip on uneven surfaces 6. Trendy looking girls 7. Totally blanking the big issue people and hearing them bid you a good day knowing they're really calling you a cunt and secretly wishing they had a job. 8. Waking after a good nights sleep to find dribble on your pillow, its a sure sign to knowing you've slept well 9. Free news papers with horoscopes in 10. Sick pay 11. Talking complete drunken shite to taxi drivers 12. Trying out my asian accent when talking to taxi drivers or in the local paki-mart 13. Naive people 14. Feathered pillows!!
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